Two Gentlemen of Veronica Mars

SCENE V. Courtyard of Neptune High.

Cindy “Mac” Mackenzie: Veronica! by mine honesty, welcome to Neptune High!

Veronica Mars: Forswear not thyself, sweet youth, for I am not welcome. I reckon this always, that a detection-mistress is never undone till she be hanged, nor never welcome to a place till some certain shot be paid and the host say, ‘welcome’!

Mac: To the cafeteria with you, where, for one shot of five pence, thou shalt have five thousand welcomes.

Veronica: Sirrah, this mystery be solv’d.

Scene VI. ANON, THE VERY SAME.

Logan: Sir Piz, what says Veronica to my suit?
Piz: O, sir, I find her milder than she was; and yet she takes exceptions at your person.
Logan: What, that my leg is too long?
Piz: No; that it is too little.
Logan: Considers she my possessions?
Piz: O, ay; and pities them.
Logan: Wherefore?
Veronica: [Aside] That such an ass should owe them.
Logan: And of the sex tape?
Piz: [Aghast] My lord!
Veronica: [Aside] Love will not be spurr’d to what distributes it via internet-cable.
Logan: Would that I might blacken the face of such a coward as made
the tape of nude Veronica we have all played
Veronica: By my troth, I love him againe!

AND, SCENE


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